What Did You Say?
by Oswin Jae
Summary: Merlin drabbles inspired by weird or strange words. Anything from angst to crack, but mostly crack. No slash. #1 Agastopia, #2 Bibble, #3 Coxcomb, #4 Gabelle, #5 Firman, #6 Anencephalous, #7 Loquacious, #8 Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious ... #13 Anatidaephobia
1. Agastopia

**Hello! So I started another story. I know I already have another drabble story but this deserved a story all its own. Updates for this should be much more regular then the other. On with the drabble!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Merlin.**

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><p>Lady Rosamund looked out over the training field watching the handsome knights of Camelot do sword drills in the heat of the sun.<p>

She was new to Camelot and found the swirling red and gold capes dancing in the breeze mesmerizing.

Something else mesmerizing caught Rosamund's eye.

The knight Percival's arms, bulging and rippling with muscles and tension after each strike or block.

Those large, strong arms. The tall knight had no chainmail sleeves to hide them. Rosamund knew he must simply be the strongest knight of Albion.

She smiled. It looked like she found her date to the ball.

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><p><strong>I required an OC for this one. I rather like her. She may pop up other drabbles, whenever I'm in need of an OC. Have a nice day!<strong>


	2. Bibble

**What? Two chapters in one day? What is this madness?! It's me realizing I didn't put the definition agastopia in the previous chapter and I didn't what to delete it and upload it again. Agastopia- n. Admiration of a particular part of someone's body. (Namely Percy's arms.)**

**Bibble- v. To drink often; to eat and/or drink noisily**

**Still don't own Merlin.**

Merlin had a headache. A headache quickly escalating into a migraine. What had made him think it was a good idea to stay up all night chasing rogue sorcerers aroung the castle? Oh yeah, that wasn't his idea. It was the stupid giant lizard under the castle's idea.

Sometimes the dragon just _would not_ let Merlin sleep.

_Merlin... Merlin... I know you can hear me..._

Arthur was eating lunch while Merlin straitened the room. Arthur was drinking his water _so loudly_.

_Slurp... Slurp...Gulp..._

"Would you _please_ stop your bibbling?" Merlin yelled before storming out of the room.

Arthur sat frozen, confused. What was bibbling?


	3. Coxcomb

**Hi again! Today's word: Coxcomb (Cockscomb) – the cap of a jester, decorated to resemble the comb of a rooster.**

**Still no Merlin owning.**

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><p>"Arthur," Merlin growled, "I will never forgive you for this."<p>

"That's fine Merlin. I wasn't expecting you to." Arthur patted his shoulder then led the way into the banquet hall.

"I present," he called in his most kingly voice, "our new court jester!"

All eyes turned to Merlin standing just behind the king in ridiculaous red, green, and blue, garb with dozens of tiny bells and a chicken-like hat. Everyone burst into cheers and laughter, Gwaine being the loudest.

Merlin gritted his teeth and smiled.

The next morning Arthur awoke with the chicken hat on and couldn't get it off.


	4. Gabelle

**Hiiiii! Glad you came, please enjoy your stay. Gabelle - a tax on salt**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Merlin.**

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><p>Uther was bored. Coucil meetings were so so very boring. Why had he appointed all these old windbags as advisors? What did they know? All they wanted was food and power.<p>

Retired knight Sir What's-His-Name said, "I propose we double the gabelle."

Uther froze. Double the what? What's gabelle?

Lord Too-Fat-For-His-Own-Good said, "I disagree, who can pay twice the gabelle?"

_What are they talking about?_ Uther wondered. _Just nod and act like a king._

Gaius turned to him. "What is your opinion on the gabelle, Sire?"

"I," Uther hesitated, "don't think we should raise the gabelle." _Whatever that is._

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><p><strong>Part 2 of this tomorrow. <strong>


	5. Firman

**Hi, yes you are probably frowning at the screen right now because I said I would have this up yesterday and I'm late. I do have an excuse, though it's not a very good one. I got busy with going to the doctor with my grandma, then my brother had a basketball game, and I'm getting ready to graduate art school and I was exhausted...I'm sure you aren't interested in my life though. Sorry I'm late.**

**Firman – a decree or mandate issued by the sovereign**

**I don't own Merlin.**

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><p>Uther was still confused from the gabelle issue when another dusty old advisor said, "Sire, I would like to suggest you announce a firman on grain storing after this harvest."<p>

_A firman?_ Uther had always considered himself a smart man but now his council members were deciding to show off there own vocabulary skills.

The king wouldn't let himself be made a joke like this.

Scowling, he bellowed, "The council is dismissed. _NOW!_"

Uther yelled for Geoffery the librarian to come back as everyone waddled toward the doors.

"Geoffery," he said in a lowered tone, "bring me the dictionary."


	6. Anencephalous

**Oh you again. Just gidding I'm extremely happy you are here! Please don't leave meee!**

**Many thanks to Elise.v for reviewing both my drabble fics!**

**Today's word: Anencephalous – definition below in the drabble.**

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><p>Uther and Gaius were eating dinner. The king had invited his long-time friend and advisor for a meal in his chambers. They were in a very awkward lull of conversation both realizing that they weren't as close as they used to be.<p>

Desperate for any type of sound other than chewing, Uther said, "Your young ward, Gaius. Have you diagnosed his mental condition yet? Or found a cure?"

Gaius swallowed. "It's very rare. I believe that the boy has anencephalous."

"And what is that?" asked Uther.

Gaius hesitated, "The absence of a brain, sire. Unfortunately there is no cure."

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><p><strong>Drop a review if you like. :)<strong>


	7. Loquacious

**Hellooo! I'm back! Hopefully for a long time!**

**Loquacious: tending to talk a great deal; talkative**

**You should have it by now, I don't own Merlin.**

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><p>"And then Arthur said the apple wasn't red enough. How could it not be red enough? It looked like I bled all over it! Not that the color of the apple mattered since the prat won't eat the outside anyway. It has to be peeled and sliced with exact precision, or the cabbage head won't eat it! Ha! The cabbage head won't eat apples!"<p>

Geoffrey massaged his temple, Merlin had been talking about ridiculous nonsense for the better part of an hour.

"You," he pointed at Merlin, "are the most loquacious young man I have ever met."

Merlin tilted his head. "I don't know that word. Is it a compliment?"

"It is if you leave."

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><p><strong>Feel free to drop a word you want me to use!<strong>


	8. Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

To the guest that requested this one, I could not tell if you were sarcastic or not. So here it is anyway. :)

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious- adj. extraordinarily good; wonderful

Consider this disclaimed.

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><p>A little known fact: Gauis loves poetry. An even lesser known fact: He wrote it too. He found great pleasure and peace and the calmness of writing his emotions and perceptions.<p>

One day, while searching for a place to hide a magic amulet he had no business having, Merlin stumbled on a stack of hundreds of poems written by the physician himself.

He was reading one when Gauis returned.

"Merlin! What are you reading?"

"My eyes are 'blue as the ocean and twice as deep'?"

"That is private!"

"You're really good though Gauis! You're supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!"

"Thank you Merlin. And you are pretty as a girl."


	9. Nihility

**Wassuuuup? I still don't own Merlin.**

**Nihility- meaning literally, nothing.**

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><p>Morgana sat on her bed staring out the window.<p>

Gwaine sat on a bench in the tavern staring into an empty mug.

Arthur stood alone on the training field gazing into the sky.

Gwen examined a flower she found that morning.

Percival lay on his bed staring at the ceiling.

Gaius stared into a pot he would make stew in later.

Merlin stood at the top of the castle watching the horizon, thankful there were no enemies today.


	10. Defenestrate

**Hello, my lovelies!**

**Defenestrate- To throw someone or something out the window**

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><p>"Why did you just do that?"<p>

"Do what, sire?"

"Throw my sword out the window!"

"Well if you insist, my lord."

Arthur's second sword went flying out of the window to join the first.

"MERLIN!"

"Yes, sire?"

"What is the matter with you?"

"Well, Arthur, I have something to tell you, and I needed to make sure you didn't have any weapons."

"What did you do?"

"Promise not to hurt me?"

"No."

"Okay. Well, I told Gwaine about the time you had donkey ears. Arthur? Nothing to say? Arthur, Arthur! No! Leave the dagger on in the sheath!"

Merlin took off running.

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><p><strong>Why yes. Reviews do make me write more.<strong>


	11. Gammon

**Hello! I hope you're all having a good day so far!**

**Gammon- deception; smoked ham**

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><p>"And to express and gratitude for your long journey to sign our peace treaty," Uther said to Bayard as they stood on the steps in the courtyard, "We present you with this delicious smoked ham to eat on your journey back home." Bayard and Uther's knights were gathered around them as the visiting king prepared to depart. A servant appeared with a wrapped package that Arthur, who was standing next to his father, assumed was a smoked ham. The kings exchanged goodbyes and Bayard and his men left.<p>

"That package looked big to be a ham," said Arthur.

"It wasn't a ham," said Uther conspiratorially. "It was a turkey."

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><p><strong>It wasn't spiral-cut either.<strong>


	12. Tartle

**Tartle - The act of hesitating when introducing someone due to having forgotten his/her name.**

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><p>Gwaine, Leon, Percival, Lancelot, and Elyan made to introduce themselves to the new knight trainees. They were young and frightened looking (and they well should be) and as fun as it would be to watch them fumble alone, Arthur had ordered them to be friendly.<p>

"You're in for a real... Adventure, mates," Gwaine said. The rest gave a conspiratorial chuckle, which only served to further frighten the trainees.

"I'm Gwaine, that is Leon over there with the stupidly curly hair, next to Percival, then Elyan, and this is," he jerked a thumb to Lancelot at his side and froze. He chewed his lip thoughtfully.

"Seriously?" said Lancelot, eyebrows raised in offence. "You forgot my name?"

"No, I didn't forget your name, it's just not coming to me right now." Gwaine pinched the bridge of his nose to concentrate, a motion he'd picked up from Arthur.

"Jonathan!" yelled Percival.

"No, no, it's not that," said Gwaine.

Lancelot turned his glare on Percival.

"Larry!" shouted Leon.

Gwaine pointed at him. "Getting closer."

"Beetlejuice!" called Elyan.

Gwaine doubled over laughing while Lancelot shouted, "_Do I look like a Beetlejuice to you_?"

"It doesn't matter," gasped Gwaine, "You're Beetlejuice now. You can call him Beetlejuice," he said to the trainees.

"My name's not Beetlejuice! Hey! You can't just walk away laughing! Don't, no, don't tell Gwen!"

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><p><strong>Lol Poor Lancelot, or should I say Beetlejuice? This is the kind of stuff that pops in my mind at 2 in the morning. Yeah, it's way over 100 words, but I haven't updated in forever so who cares.<strong>


	13. Anatidaephobia

**Aaaaay I'm back! This is a prompt fill for StarlightInHerEyes22. I love your words and I just had to do this one first! I hope you likey!**

**Anatidaephobia - The irrational fear that one is being watched by a duck. An anatidaephobic fears that no matter where they are or what they are doing, a duck is watching them.**

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><p>Arthur drummed his fingers listlessly on his desk. The bright morning sunlight filtered in through the window behind him, making the dark shadows under his eyes that betrayed how restless his night was even blacker.<p>

Arthur could still hear the sounds that haunted his nightmares, those horrible, grating, unrythmic sounds that kept his muscles from releasing their tension.

His eyes flitted from the door, to the closet, to the window, to underneath his bed. He knew it was there somewhere. He couldn't get any work done with _it_ staring at him like that.

Merlin watched Arthur's nervous eyes dart from every corner of the room and back. Normally, he would've made fun of Arthur.

But he heard the quacking too.


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